Shall I stay/ Would it be a sin / If I cant help falling in love with you
Kate walked from the car to her door, not knowing what to do. She wasn’t ready to say goodbye, she wanted more. She wanted to say so but could not find the right words. She reached in her purse to find the key to the door and smiled as she thought of how she had spent the last six hours. It was innocent enough, but just to be there gave her butterflies and goose bumps. She could hear the car behind her, waiting until she was inside before leaving. She played a little game just to see how long she could prolong the car from leaving. She dropped her keys and slowly bent over to pick them up. That’s when she heard the car door open and close. Result! As she stood up she stayed facing the door. The light over the door was off and she was glad to have the cover of night to hide behind. She would not want what was written all over her face to be so easily visible.
“Are you ok?” he asked
“Sure, just dropped my keys. Thanks for driving me home and waiting for me to get in” she said.
“No problem. Here let me get the door.” He took the keys from her.
She was going to have to do something or the chance would be gone, the moment lost and there would not be another one for a long time. She stood there frozen as if she was watching a movie and she was in it. She willed herself to do something but what?
He started to key the lock when she reached out and touched his hand. As she did, the butterflies in her stomach started to fly all at once. She could feel the heat in her body rising. He turned his head, to look into her eyes.
“Kate?”
It was dark but she felt like there was a glow around them both. She could not find the words.
“Kate? Are you ok?” he asked again
“I’m … I’m just not ready to go in yet.”
“Kate, it’s late. I think you really should go in.”
He was trying to be strong. He was trying to let her know she did not have to do anything she did not want to do.
“Mr. Simon. David. I really don’t want to go in” she said as she moved closer to him.
He took a step back.
“Kate, I think that is close enough. And I think you should really get inside.”
She let her purse fall to the ground and let the strap of her top fall off her shoulder as it did. She knew that she was beautiful; she had seen him look at her the way other men did when she was at the beach with them last week. She was not so young.
He took another step back and was now pressed against the porch wall. He was a big man, she liked big men.
“Kate. I really can’t”
It was dark but she could still see he was reacting to her.
“Kate, you are a beautiful girl but I am not what you want. You’re my babysitter and I’m old enough to be …”
She cut him off and finished his sentence “My lover” She pushed up onto her toes, reached up and held his face with both hands, pressed herself against him and kissed him.
The butterflies exploded.
Only for a second did she think that the whole ‘my lover’ thing sounded too corny but she could feel him giving into her. His hands stop pushing her hips and started to pull her against him.
She was lost, she had found the line and leaped over it. She had been thinking about this for months. She knew it had been over a year since his wife died and that he was still damaged. She knew that the kids were his world and she knew that she was not what he was looking for. But she also knew that she was old enough to know what she wanted. She knew that despite their age difference he made her laugh until her sides hurt. And she knew she had been falling in love with him for the past 3 months.
She opened her eyes and looked into his eyes. She saw it and knew.
She let him go and took a step back.
“David, it’s ok. I know what I am doing.”
“I don’t” he said, now leaning against the wall willingly. “I had no idea you felt this way. And I think you’re great, I really do. I have to admit I have thought if you were just six or seven years older….”
“What’s six years David? There are woman my age in the army, dying over in Iraq. There are woman my age having babies for American families in India. What is so wrong with you being with me?”
“Kate, you are only 20 years old. I am 35 for Christ’s sake. You live at home and I am closer to your Mother’s age than I am to yours.”
“All of that is bullshit and you know it.”
She moved a little closer. Whispering she said “Everyone has secrets, David. Couldn’t you be my secret?” A little closer, almost touching, still whispering “I know you I can make you happy. I can be there when you need me.”
She looked up to see him close his eyes, let out a heavy sigh and run his tongue across his bottom lip the way his did when he was making a decision. She could smell the body wash he used and she wanted to go back to his, right now.
She reached up to kiss him again, his hands reached out to her hips not pushing or pulling, trying to decide ….
Suddenly the porch light came on and the door flew open spilling a flood of light onto his face and she saw his eyes go wide and his eye brows rise in surprise.
She spun around.
“Daddy?!!”
Part 2 is here
Stunned B'y 